International Women’s Day
In honor of International Women’s Day, I felt compelled to share something from my heart.
For the past two years, I’ve been on a physical healing journey, and for the last 14 months, I’ve been focused on healing my mind and soul. I can honestly say it has been a long, lonely, and painful process—but it has been entirely worth it.
Talking or writing about your trauma and shame is never easy—I know that firsthand. I hid mine for decades. It takes real courage! But in doing so, you’re not just confronting it—you’re freeing yourself from it, and that feeling is incredibly empowering.
Allowing yourself to replace that pain and trauma with peace will give you a strength you never knew you had.
I always thought I was strong because I endured so much pain and just kept pushing forward, but suppressing your trauma doesn't make you strong. It makes you tough on the outside, but weak on the inside. Betraying your soul—hurts and hurts, again and again.
Choosing to heal—taking that first step—is where true strength lies. Confronting and acknowledging whatever is obstructing your peace is crucial to healing yourself.
Each day you choose healing, you will grow stronger and stronger. Through the pain, the tears, and the loneliness, you will find peace and happiness. The only way out is through.
You have to ask yourself: Is your shame, your pain, worth sacrificing your peace? That’s what it all comes down to.
I don’t wanna be tough anymore. I’ve shown and I have proved toughness—I’m done with that life!
Now, I have strength. True strength. True happiness. Real peace.
Everything I went through over the past two years was terrifying as fuck—but it was worth it. Because today, I feel free. The person I was always meant to be has finally emerged.
If you’re suffering, hurting, hiding in shame, or numbing your pain with alcohol or drugs, I encourage you to find an outlet to release whatever is holding you back—the weight that’s keeping you from embracing your true self and reaching your full potential, whatever that may be.
I was doing all of those things, and I didn’t even realize I was suppressing trauma—I found out the hard way. I was 50 years old, sitting in my living room with my friend Jen, with a buzz on, when the topic of healing came up. I shrugged it off and said, “Ya, well, too fucking bad! I’m 50, and it’s too late. This is me. This is just how I am, so…” and that’s truly how I felt.
Deep down, I knew I had demons in my closet—more than a few. But I wasn’t willing to confront them. I didn’t even want to acknowledge them.
After 40+ years of suppressing all I had endured, it only took one more thing to have everything I suppressed over the years explode in my face, I was forced to acknowledge my shit.
After a series of betrayals and the devastating news that I needed open-heart surgery, I hit my breaking point. That was it for me. I don’t recommend that route—bottling everything up until one thing tips the scales and leads to a mental breakdown. Granted, for me it was a big thing—huge—but everything I had suppressed was much bigger.
When it hurts, when it stings—acknowledge it. Pain demands to be felt. Whether it’s today or tomorrow, it doesn’t go away until you face it and release it.
Don’t let your bin pile up so high that it overflows and explodes. Let it out as it comes.
I wish someone had told me what I’m telling you now, years ago—before it took my whole life, plus two years of healing, to finally find my true self.
Let it out. Get it out. There are many paths to healing—pick one. It all starts and ends with you.
Be brave. Be courageous. Be free. Be true to yourself and have faith.
Every single person on this earth deserves to have inner peace and happiness.
Authentically yours,
Jaye
Better days :)
